You know things just happen. They come up. And suddenly a whirlwind of possibility sweeps over you and you realize what could have been. All over again. And then I get to asking myself - Haven't I already been here, like a thousand times!? The life that so quickly slipped clean out of your hands. Or maybe it's just me. I like to think I'm not alone.
It happened. I slipped and the whirlwind swept over me like a lead balloon. It makes me crazy how quickly she came and then left. And her visit, as I like to think of it, has made all the difference. It's then that I am reminded not only of what I lost, but to what I am called.
You hear so many things that are meant to comfort a bereaved parent, like "God needed an angel" or "God knows best" or even "she was too precious for this earth". But at the end of the day none of these things fill the gaping hole in your heart.
I do believe God knows best but I don't think he needed her to die. It just happened. Plain and simple. And of all people I got to carry her. She is part of my story and one of the biggest reasons my life is what it is today. I got reminded today of how much a one pound baby changed my world. I owe her everything.
10 comments:
<3 Beautiful!
Just beautiful <3
Beautiful <3
Caroline
Fran,
I too have been changed by your precious Jenna. Your right, no words can make it feel any better and knowing that she is changing lives and healing hearts amazes me. I am so blessed to have gotten to know her and spend time with her. Thank you for sharing her with so many, carrying on her name and purpose. God couldn't have chosen a better mama to have carried her and loved her. You are so beautiful friend. Bubby is such a lucky brother. I can't wait for him to get older so that we all can tell him what a wonderful sister he has. Lets get together soon! I miss you two!
Much love to you and your sweet babe and all that she has brought to your life and to ours as well.
xo
Thank you for sharing Jenna with us Franchesca... XOXOXO
It's amazing how such a brief life can forever change yours.
Franchesca, you express yourself so beautifully, I'm right there with you being reminded over a 1000's times and then remember about my calling. And I agree that God didn't need her to die, it just happended. Sending love and remembering your sweet girl with you.
The transformation we go through after a loss is huge sometimes. I just know that because of her many of us have been healed just a bit.
Beautiful. ((HUGS))
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